12 Motorcycle Myths

on Thursday, May 17, 2012


The Deadly Dozen: 12 Motorcycle Safety Myths and Misconceptions

When science meets urban legend and imperfect logic, some of the "facts" motorcyclists think they "know" about motorcycle safety, crashes, and riding turn out to be dangerous myths and misconceptions. From the February 2006 issue of Motorcycle Cruiser
From the February, 2009 issue of Motorcycle Cruiser


pretty sweet video...

on Friday, May 11, 2012

I love the MysteryGuitarMan...  I follow his videos and he always comes up with the best freaking stuff!


Holy ebay score, Batman!!

So as I do every few weeks, I was just cruising eBay for anything Boulevard M50 related. I came across this auction a mere hour before time ran out on it. It was for a sissy bar and luggage rack off an '09 Boulevard M50. There was only one picture of it and ridiculously few details. You can see the auction here still probably. So I post a quick question here to find out if the '09 will fit an '06 and get a fast answer that it will. I even double checked with the dealer and they said it would too. So I threw down a bid of $60 at about the 45 second mark. I'm a notorious sniper and that is how I win most of my auctions if I have the chance. I hate giving people the chance to run me up. I win it for $51 with free shipping! You can't beat that! I figured even if it was a cheap Chinese sissy bar then I at least got it for a good deal.

Fast forward a couple days and UPS brings me a box to my office. I open it up and start taking out the pieces. This seems to be a lot higher quality than I expected from a $51 sissy bar. Then I notice the back of the seat rest.



Holy %%%%...! It's a Paladin back rest with luggage rack and quick release brackets! That's like a $500 setup!!! It even seems to have all of the hardware and the key to the quick release!





Now I'm torn as to whether I keep it or flip it! lol It was purchased on a whim. I didn't even have the $50 bucks to pay for it yet. I put one of my vintage Metallica shirts up on ebay the next day and sold it for $50 bucks to cover the cost of the backrest. lol Gotta love vintage stuff... Anyway, I'm pretty stoked. My only dilemma is what I am going to do with it now. I have never had a passenger on my bike in my entire life of riding. I took the rear pegs off my bike three years ago just for a cleaner look and because I wasn't even using a pillion anyway. But now I've got my saddle bags on because it helps me carry my lunch to work with me, so I put the pillion back on and figure I'd complete the look with a sissy bar. I'm just so happy that I didn't have to get a cut rate unit just because I went the cheap route. Every now and then eBay shocks and amazes me... This was a total crap shoot and I hit the friggin' jackpot on this one!



There is hardly a scratch on this thing. I can't believe the owner had it on their bike for very long at all. Based on the other things this seller sells, it must have been either a repo or an auction sale, because nobody who shells out the kind of money this kind of thing costs would have let it go for $50 bucks and not even charged shipping. It probably cost 25 or 30 bucks just to get it to me.  More likely is that he is just a dealership and parts out the accessories that he doesn't want to give away with the bike when he sells that for book value.

It seriously only took like 5 minutes to install. I did it in the parking lot at work with just the same allen key that I used to put the rest of it together. It pops the bags out enough that they don't even come close to rubbing. The only issue I might have is them flapping a bit because they aren't tied down to anything right now. I'll have to look into solutions for that, but right now I don't even feel compelled to get longer bolts to fit the braces.







The other bonus is that since it is a quick release bracket it leaves these knobs that look just like my Cobra bungee knobs that I had on before I put the saddle bag supports on.  So if I wanted to strap something down over the pillion without the backrest on, it would be a piece of cake.

I'm not entirely sure what I want to do with this.  I've never had anyone on the back of my bike before, but I remember how much I loved getting on my grandpa's bike when I was little.  It didn't happen very often at all, but man was it fun.  My kids would absolutely love a ride on this thing, and now that I have the backrest on it, I feel much less fear that they would fall off. 

Wonka was a poet...

on Thursday, May 10, 2012

From the following site:  http://home.comcast.net/~tom.brodhead/wonka.htm

Quotations and Literary Allusions spoken by Willy Wonka in the 1971 film,
Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
by Thomas M. Brodhead
HugeWonkaFan@yahoo.com


First things first: Aaron Villa's wonderful transcript of the film (left-click to view, or right-click to download.)

When Quaker Oats (yes, the Quaker Oats company!) decided to adapt Roald Dahl's Charlie and the Chocolate Factory for film, Roald Dahl was asked to write the screenplay. Dahl produced a fairly literal translation of his book that was deemed unacceptable by the studio executives. The young writer and script doctor David Seltzer was then asked to "improve" Dahl's script. The result was a recalibration of Dahl's story with many significant changes (e.g. rival chocolatier Slugworth became a central character in the film as a tempter of the children, etc.) More importantly, Wonka was cast in a darker light, with an ambiguous stance toward the children (as opposed to the sprightly and somewhat avuncular candyman of Dahl's conception.)
In the finished script, Wonka's dialogue is peppered with literary quotations and allusions not found in Dahl's book. They were all introduced by David Seltzer as part of his rewrite of Dahl's screenplay. (Does anyone have a copy of Dahl's original screenplay? Please contact me...)
Below is a listing of every line from Wonka's dialogue that I have been able to trace to an external source. Most of the quotations are from Shakespeare, two come from Ogden Nash, the others from various sources. If you know of other quotations in Wonka's dialogue, or if you'd simply like to rap about Wonka, the Genius of Gene Wilder, or anything else under the sun, please contact me at HugeWonkaFan@yahoo.com

[While opening the combination lock]
WONKA: 99...44...100 percent pure

Obvious reference: the Ivory Soap ad line
Not-so-obvious reference: Poetry and aphorisms by Ogden Nash are quoted elsewhere by Wonka, suggesting that Seltzer was familiar with Nash's output. It is perhaps not a coincidence that one of Nash's poems is:


Home, 99 44/100% Sweet Home
by Ogden Nash [1902-1971]

Home is heaven and orgies are vile,
But I like an orgy, once in a while.

[In the room behind the combination lock door]
WONKA: Is it my soul that calls upon my name?


from Romeo and Juliet
by William Shakespeare [1564-1616]
Act II, Scene 2 [balcony scene]

ROMEO
It is my soul that calls upon my name:
How silver-sweet sound lovers' tongues by night,
Like softest music to attending ears!

[In the doorway-filled hallway that becomes increasingly smaller]
WONKA: Oh, you should never, never doubt what nobody is sure about.


The Microbe
by Hilaire Belloc [1870-1953]

The Microbe is so very small
You cannot make him out at all,
But many sanguine people hope
To see him through a microscope.
His jointed tongue that lies beneath
A hundred curious rows of teeth;
His seven tufted tails with lots
Of lovely pink and purple spots,
On each of which a pattern stands,
Composed of forty separate bands;
His eyebrows of a tender green;
All these have never yet been seen--
But Scientists, who ought to know,
Assure us that they must be so...
Oh! let us never, never doubt
What nobody is sure about!

[At the chocolate river, watching Augustus Gloop trapped in the pipe]
WONKA: The suspense is terrible. I hope it'll last.

from The Importance of Being Earnest, Act III
by Oscar Wilde [1854-1900]

GWENDOLEN:
The suspense is terrible. I hope it will last.

[To Mrs. Gloop as she is led off by Oompah Loompahs]
WONKA: Nihil desperandum, dear lady.
Source: not an improbable Latin expression, but compare:

Odes (I, 7, 27)
by Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus) [65-8 B.C.]

quo nos cumque feret melior fortuna parente,
ibimus--o socii comitesque,
nil desperandum Teucro duce et auspice Teucro:
certus enim promisit Apollo

(Translation:)
Where Fortune bears us, than my sire more kind,
There let us go, my own, my gallant crew.
'Tis Teucer leads, 'tis Teucer breathes the wind;
No more despair; Apollo's word is true."

[My thanks to Nick Lambert for hitting on this.]


[Continuing, to Mrs. Gloop as she is led off by Oompah Loompahs]
WONKA: Across the desert lies the promised land.

Source: probably popular, but compare:

The Dance of Life, Chapter 3
by Havelock Ellis [1859-1939]

The Promised Land always lies on the other side of a wilderness

[Boarding the Wonkatania]
WONKA: All I ask is a tall ship and a star to sail her by.


from Sea Fever
by John Masefield [1878-1967]

I must down to the seas again, to the lonely sea and the sky,
And all I ask is a tall ship and a star to steer her by,
And the wheel's kick, and the wind's song and the white sail's shaking,
And a gray mist on the sea's face, and a grey dawn breaking.
I must down to the seas again, for the call of the running tide
Is a wild call and a clear call which may not be denied.
And all I ask is a windy day with white clouds flying,
And flung spray and blown spume, and the seagulls crying.
I must down to the seas again, to the vagrant gypsy life,
To the gull's way, and the whale's way, where the wind's like a whetted knife.
And all I ask is a merry yarn from a laughing fellow rover,
And a quite sleep and a sweet dream when the long trick's over.

[Before the Wonkatania enters the dark tunnel]
WONKA: 'Round the world and home again, that's the sailor's way!


from Homeward Bound
by William Allingham [1828-1889]

Head the ship for England!
Shake out every sail!
Blithe leap the billows,
Merry sings the gale.
Captain, work the reckoning;
How many knots a day? -
Round the world and home again,
That's the sailor's way!

[Upon the completion of the Wonkatania ride]
WONKA: A small step for mankind, but a giant step for us.


Neil Armstrong [b. 1930]
One small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.

[Mixing a concoction in the Invention Room]
WONKA: Invention, my dear friends, is ninety-three percent perspiration, six percent electricity, four percent evaporation, and two percent butterscotch ripple.


Thomas Edison [1847-1931]
Genius is one percent inspiration, and ninety-nine percent perspiration.

[On a bicycle in the Inventing Room]
WONKA (singing):

In springtime, the only pretty ring time
Birds sing, hey ding
A-ding, a-ding
Sweet lovers love the spring--


from As You Like It, Act V, Scene 3
by William Shakespeare [1564-1616]

SONG
It was a lover and his lass,
With a hey, and a ho, and a hey nonino,
That o'er the green cornfield did pass,
In the springtime, the only pretty ring time,
When birds do sing, hey ding a ding, ding;
Sweet lovers love the spring.
[Here Shakespeare is quoting the popular Celtic ballad, "It was a lover and his lass"]


[In the inventing room, to Mr. Salt]
WONKA: Candy is dandy, but liquor is quicker.

Reflections on Ice-Breaking
by Ogden Nash [1902-1971]

Candy
Is Dandy
But liquor
Is quicker.

[After Violet has been rolled away to the juicing room]
WONKA: Where is fancy bred? In the heart, or in the head? Shall we roll on?

[Note the pun on "bred" (homophone: bread) and roll (homonym, e.g. dinner roll)]

from The Merchant of Venice, Act III, Scene 2
by William Shakespeare [1564-1616]

SONG
Tell me where is Fancy bred,
Or in the heart or in the head?

How begot, how nourished?
Reply, reply.
It is engender'd in the eyes,
With gazing fed; and Fancy dies
In the cradle where it lies.
Let us all ring Fancy's knell:
I'll begin it,
Ding, dong, bell.
Ding, dong, bell.

[In the hallway with lickable wallpaper]
WONKA: We are the music-makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams.

from Ode
by Arthur O'Shaughnessy [1844-1881]

We are the music-makers,
And we are the dreamers of dreams,

Wandering by lone sea-breakers,
And sitting by desolate streams.
World-losers and world-forsakers,
Upon whom the pale moon gleams;
Yet we are the movers and shakers,
Of the world forever, it seems.

With wonderful deathless ditties
We build up the world's great cities,
And out of a fabulous story
We fashion an empire's glory:
One man with a dream, at pleasure,
Shall go forth and conquer a crown;
And three with a new song's measure
Can trample an empire down.

We, in the ages lying
In the buried past of the earth,
Built Nineveh with our sighing,
And Babel itself with our mirth;
And o'erthrew them with prophesying
To the old of the new world's worth;
For each age is a dream that is dying,
Or one that is coming to birth.

[Introducing fizzy lifting drinks]
WONKA: Bubbles, bubbles everywhere, but not a drop to drink.

from The Rime of the Ancient Mariner
by Samuel Taylor Coleridge [1772-1834]

Water, water, every where,
And all the boards did shrink;
Water, water, every where,
Nor any drop to drink.

[Note that this line is commonly misquoted as "Water, water everywhere, and not a drop to drink"; Wonka's line is a transformation of the common misquotation.]


[Explaining the Eggdicator]
WONKA: A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men.

Bartlett's Quotations lists this as Anonymous, but suggests a possible source in:

Letter to Sir Horace Mann, 1774
by Horace Walpole [1717-1797]

A careless song, with a little nonsense in it now and then,
does not misbecome a monarch.
Also compare:
Carmina (IV, 12, 27)
by Horace (Quintus Horatius Flaccus) [65-8 B.C.]

Misce stultitiam consiliis brevem: Dulce est desipere in loco.
(Translation: Mingle a little folly with your wisdom; a little nonsense now and then is pleasant.)
This would suggest that Horace Walpole was alluding to the Classical Horace in his letter to Horace Mann.
(What are the odds of that happening?)


[Introducing the Wonkamobile]
WONKA: A thing of beauty is a joy forever.

from Endymion, Book 1
by John Keats [1795-1821]

A thing of beauty is a joy for ever:
Its loveliness increases; it will never
Pass into nothingness; but still will keep
A bower quiet for us, and a sleep
Full of sweet dreams, and health, and quiet breathing.

[At the Wonkamobile, explaining to Grandpa Joe the engine's fuel]
WONKA: ...bubble cola, double cola, double bubble burp-a-cola...

[This isn't a quote per se, but seems to echo another line from the bard]

from Macbeth, Act IV, Scene 1
by William Shakespeare [1564-1616]

WITCHES
Double, double, toil and trouble;
Fire, burn; and caldron, bubble.


[During the Wonkamobile ride]
WONKA: Swifter than eagles...stronger than lions...

from The Bible: 2 Samuel 1:23

Saul and Jonathan were lovely and pleasant in their lives,
and in their death they were not divided:
they were swifter than eagles, they were stronger than lions

[During the Wonkamobile ride]
WONKA [singing]:

Martha! Martha! Du entschwandest,
Und mein Glück nahmst du mit dir;
Gib mir wieder, was du fandest,
Oder teile es mit mir


[Translation:
Martha! Martha! You have Vanished
My Happiness you took with you
Give me back what you found,
or share it with me.]

from the opera Martha
by Friedrich von Flotow [1812-1883]
Libretto by Wilhelm Friedrich Riese [1805?-1879]
[Many thanks to Andrew Parker for help with the translation, locating the complete libretto, and the identifying the true surname and dates of the librettist]


[In the Wonkavision room, advising Mike Teavee]
WONKA: You should open your mouth a little wider when you speak.

from Through the Looking-Glass, And What Alice Found There
by Lewis Carroll [1832-1898]

Chapter II: The Garden of Live Flowers
[The Red Queen, advising Alice:]
"It's time for you to answer now," the Queen said, looking at her watch:
"open your mouth a little wider when you speak, and always say 'your Majesty.'"
[My thanks to Nina Choudhary for hitting on this.]


[To Mrs. Teavee as she is dragged away by Oompah Loompahs]
WONKA: Parting is such sweet sorrow

from Romeo and Juliet, Act II, Scene 2
by William Shakespeare [1564-1616]

JULIET
Good Night, Good night!
Parting is such sweet sorrow,
that I shall say good night till it be morrow.

[Angrily to Grandpa Joe, reading the contract signed by the children]
WONKA: ...fax mentis incendium gloriae...

Variously translated:
"The incitement to Glory is the Torch of the Mind"
"The torch of glory kindles the mind"
"The flame of glory is the torch of the mind"


This Latin motto belongs to the family of Hastings-Forbes, Earls of Granard. The Earldom was created in 1675, so presumably the motto was adopted around that time. It has been used many times since, and now is used as a motto by many secondary schools and colleges around the world.

[Continuing reading the contract to Grandpa Joe]
WONKA: ...memo bis punitor delicatum...

As Latin, this is gibberish. However, if Seltzer was mistaken in his Latin, or if Wilder read the line wrong, then a more probable source text would be:
Memo(r) bis punitur delictum

Simply translated:
"I am mindful (that) the crime is punished twice [or in two ways]."


[Many thanks to Chuck Crane, visitor to this site, for this suggestion.]



[To himself, holding the Everlasting Gobstopper that Charlie has left on his desk]
WONKA: So shines a good deed in a weary world.

from The Merchant of Venice, Act V, Scene 1
by William Shakespeare [1564-1616]

PORTIA
That light we see is burning in my hall.
How far that little candle throws his beams!
So shines a good deed in a naughty world.
[Note that David Seltzer changed the crucial word "naughty" to "weary", giving the line more relevance in the context of the story, e.g. Wonka is weary of the horrible character of most people.]


[This is spoken not by Wonka, but by the Tinker whom Charlie encounters outside the gates to the factory on his way home from school.]
TINKER: Up the airy mountain, down the rushing glen, we dare not go a-hunting, for fear of little men.

from The Fairies
William Allingham [1824-1889]

Up the airy mountain
Down the rushy glen,
We daren't go a-hunting,
For fear of little men;

Wee folk, good folk,
Trooping all together;
Green jacket, red cap,
And white owl's feather.
Down along the rocky shore
Some make their home,
They live on crispy pancakes
Of yellow tide-foam;
Some in the reeds
Of the black mountain-lake,
With frogs for their watch-dogs,
All night awake.

[There have been numerous requests for the text to the contract signed by the children at the beginning of the film. Here are the opening paragraphs, to the best of my visual abilities:]

WHEREAS The management cannot be held responsible for any accidents, incidents, loss of property or life or limb.

And

WHEREAS For damage caused by lightning, earthquakes, floods, fire, frost or frippery of any sort, kind or condition, consequently the undersigned take responsibility.

WHEREAS During the term of this Agreement you will become and remain, at your sole cost and expense and at our request, a member in good standing of any then properly designated labor unions, guilds, or other organizations, as defined and determined under the applicable law, pertaining persons performing services of the type and the character to be performed here and hereunder. Nothing herein contained shall be deemed to require the violation of any written agreement executed between us and any such labor union, guild or other organization which may be in effect at the time of the execution of this agreement, and wherever there is any conflict between the provisions of this agreement and any other, the latter shall prevail, but in such event, the provisions of this agreement so affected shall be curtailed and limited only to the events necessary to permit compliance with such payment of any additional compensation it shall be at the minimum that is permitted thereunder.

[The next paragraph is difficult to make out; anyone out there with the patience and visual acuity to take a stab at it?]

WHEREAS to the extent that...
...payment hereunder exceeds applicable guild minimum...
...excess to the fullest...
...to extent permitted by any applicable...agreement,...
...shall be credited by any against any additional payment that may have to be made...
...to said guild agreement and shall be applied...
...or any additional rights that can be required...
...payment pursuant to said guild...
...should the provision of any labor union or...
...require the execution of any agreement for you...

It's commonly known among Wonka fans that Veruca's name is actually the taxonomic name for a wart. Spelled with a double "r", the three most typical human warts are the Common Wart (verruca vulgaris), the Plantar Wart (verruca plantaris), and the Flat Wart (verruca plana).

But John Edgar, visitor to this site, has hit on another hidden medical joke among the nomenclature of the characters in the film. When Violet Beauregarde is interviewed on T.V. upon discovering a Golden Ticket, she exclaims:


Now this piece of gum here is one I've been chewing for three months solid, and that's a world record. It's beaten the record held by my best friend Miss Cornelia Prinzmetel, and was she mad! Hi, Cornelia, how are you sweetie?
Prinzmetal's Angina, or coronary artery spasm, is an uncommon condition seen in both men and women. Episodes of typical (though severe) angina are triggered when one of the major coronary arteries suddenly goes into spasm, temporarily shutting off blood flow.

Note that as with Veruca's name, one letter has been changed. (The name and dialogue are taken directly from Dahl's book, and were not an addition to the film by Seltzer.)

Eric D. Wolf, another visitor to this site, has pointed out that Mrs. Salt's first name in Dahl's book is Angina, a coronary spasm condition similar to Prinzmetal's Angina. This is more proof that Cornelia's last name was most likely not chosen at random!

Top Ten Reasons Bikers Might Not Wave

on Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Top Ten Reasons Why Harley Riders Don't Wave Back

10. Afraid it will invalidate warranty
9. Leather and studs make it too heavy to raise arm
8. Refuse to wave to anyone whose bike is already paid for
7. Afraid to let go of handlebars because they might vibrate off
6. Rushing wind would blow scabs off the new tattoos
5. Angry because just took out second mortgage to pay luxury tax on new Harley
4. Just discovered the fine print in owner's manual and realized H-D is partially owned by Honda
3. Can't tell if other riders are waving or just reaching to cover their ears like everyone else
2. Remembers the last time a Harley rider waved back, he impaled his hand on spiked helmet
1. They're too tired from spending hours polishing all that chrome to lift their arms.

Top Ten Reasons Why Gold Wing Riders Riders Don't Wave Back

10. Wasn't sure whether other rider was waving or making an obscene gesture
9. Afraid might get frostbite if hand is removed from heated grip
8. Has arthritis and the past 400 miles have made it difficult to raise arm
7. Reflection from etched windshield momentarily blinded him
6. The espresso machine just finished
5. Was actually asleep when other rider waved
4. Was in a three-way conference call with stockbroker and accessories dealer
3. Was distracted by odd shaped blip on radar screen
2. Was simultaneously adjusting the air suspension, seat height, programmable CD player, seat temperature, and satellite
navigation system
1. Couldn't find the "auto wave back" button on dashboard

Top Ten Reasons Why Sportbikers Riders Riders Don't Wave Back

10. They have not been riding long enough to know they're supposed to
9. They're going too fast to have time enough to register the movement and respond
8. You weren't wearing bright enough gear
7. If they stick their arm out going that fast they'll rip it out of the socket
6. They're too occupied with trying to get rid of their chicken strips
5. They look way too cool with both hands on the bars or they don't want to unbalance themselves while standing on the tank
4. Their skin tight-Kevlar-ballistic-nylon-kangaroo-leather suits prevent any position other than fetal
3. Raising an arm allows bugs into the armholes of their tank tops
2. It's too hard to do one-handed stoppies
1. They were too busy slipping their flip-flop back on

Top Ten Reasons Why BMW Riders Riders Don't Wave Back

10. New Aerostich suit too stiff to raise arm
9. Removing a hand from the bars is considered "bad form."
8. Your bike isn't weird enough looking to justify acknowledgment.
7. Too sore from an 800-mile day on a stock "comfort" seat.
6. Too busy programming the GPS, monitoring radar, listening to iPod, XM, and talking on the cell phone.
5. He's an Iron Butt rider and you're not!
4. Wires from Gerbings is too short.
3. You're not riding the "right kind" of BMW.
2. You haven't been properly introduced.
1. Afraid it will be misinterpreted as a friendly gesture.

Top Ten Reasons Why Dual Purpose Riders Don't Wave Back

10. Off road elbow guards, chest protector, fanny pack, drink system binds them up.
9. Bark busters and gummy grips slows the hand from raising quickly.
7. Just can't take time out from doing that 10 mile wheelie through traffic.
9. He's passing street bikes off road on the right @ 60mph through the trees & rocks.
6. Too busy checking his enduro roll chart doing mental time/mile math so he wont blow the next check point.
5. Can't see other bikers through his 20 layers of tear off's.
4. The dude only recognizes Honda's with every after market race part known to man.
3. His killer 2 inch tall knobies vibrate so bad vision is obscured.
2. The chin guard on his full face helmet sticks out so much it blocks his view.
1. He's got his Mauna Kea 200 race face on and can't be bothered.

Top Ten Reasons Why Moped & Ruckus Riders Don't Wave Back

10. Scared ****less to remove a hand from the bar's.
9.Never road this fast on a two wheel anything before.
8. Full focus three inches from front tire.
7. Freaked out on the extreme right side of the road dogging broken beer bottles and car accident trash.
6. Don't want to lose their grocery's in plastic bags hanging from the bar's.
5. Won't deter from the full attention military riding position.
4. Their mother & grandmother told them it was very, very dangerous.
3. Think it's hoodlum stunt riding.
2. Don't want to chance getting a reckless driving ticket.
1. 25 mph is too damn fast to try something stupid like that.

Two things said to me recently that irritate me

on Monday, April 23, 2012

I had two things said to me recently that annoy the shit out of me.  One was regarding a conversation about ipad type tablet devices.  Someone asked which one they should buy and I told him that they only have one choice in iPad but there are a dozen or so Android platform tablets.  I advised him to look at the Androids simply because there was more variety.  Then some jackass piped in and said that it just depends on if they want it to be easy to use or hard to use.  This is typical Apple fanboy babble.  This is the same guy who thinks Apple is better than PC because of the hardware.  Uhmmm... Pretty sure the hardware is the same.  The operating system is what separates the apples from the windows machines.  Anyway, these same Apple freaks like to say that Android is just a copy of the iPhone, but then in the next breath they like to say that Android is more complicated than the iPhone.  Yeah... maybe that is true.  Toys are generally easier to use than real tools, so I guess Apple is easier.  I'm not even going to get into all the reasons that iOS has failed in keeping up with trends, but I will say that trying to pass Apple tech off as easier to use and that makes it better just shows off the ignorance of those who say it.  There isn't any difference in ease of use between Apple and Android.  The fact that you can do more with an Android doesn't make it more complicated for the average user.  However, for those of use who are more advanced users, the choice is clear.  Would you rather drive a Powerwheel that looks like a Jeep or crush it with the real thing?

The second thing I heard recently that is brainless is someone selling their motorcycle because they are expecting a baby.  Huh?? WTF does that have to do with anything???  I didn't have to sell anything before we had our kids.  Especially a motorcycle they are only trying to get four or five grand out of.  Unless you need to free up some income to pay for the baby because you don't have insurance (which was not the case here) then that is the most illogical statement of all time.  Riding a motorcycle doesn't become any more dangerous once you have kids.  And if you are that strapped for money that you have to sell your motorcycle the instant that your expenses go up, then you shouldn't have one anyway.  The reason for selling it isn't because you are having a baby.  The real reason is because you are broke and need to liquidate assets or eliminate payments.

Equally as stupid as the selling something because you are having a baby is when I see someone selling something because they are getting married.  WHO CARES???  You are selling it.  I don't care what you are going to do with the money or why you need to get rid of it.  Just tell me it is in good shape and provide me with maintenance records.  That's all I need from you.  No life story required.

Maybe it makes for better hits on online classifieds though.  I think this will be how I list my motorcycle for sale someday:

FOR SALE:  2006 Boulevard M50.  This bike has performed really well.  It goes when you turn the throttle and it stops when you apply the brakes.  I've put gas in it every time it has run out and put air in the tires any time they seemed low.  I'm selling the bike because I am currently in jail and need the money for bail.  I also may need the money to pay for an attorney.  If I am able to get out on bail then I'll have plenty of money for an attorney from the bank I robbed, so that shouldn't be a problem.  I could also use the money to buy a new entertainment center, so that is an idea too.  Either way, if you want to give me money then I'll give you my bike. 

How to comment on Facebook

on Friday, April 20, 2012

Interesting indeed....

on Thursday, April 12, 2012

Court Rules That Code Isn’t Physical And Cannot Be Stolen, Only Copied

In December of 2010, former Goldman Sachs programmer Sergey Aleynikov was convicted of theft of trade secrets when he took some exclusive code out the door with him. This past February however, Aleynikov’s conviction was overturned due to a ruling in 2nd Circuit Court of Appeals. Now, the court’s opinion has finally been published and it’s been made clear exactly why this conviction was overturned; code is not a physical object and cannot be stolen. The code was not stolen from Goldman Sachs, only copied. Since Goldman Sachs was not deprived of its use, it wasn’t theft.

For all of us who have been banging the “piracy is not theft” drum for years, this is a significant victory in redefining the terms of theft to more accurately reflect the digital world. There is, however, a little more to unpack in this particular case, which makes things as complicated as it makes them interesting. Let’s get some of the details straight here first. The code that was stolen was had to do with the firm’s high-speed trading system, which they alone possessed until Aleynikov walked away with. He was then charged and convicted under something called the Economic Espionage Act of 1996 (EEA), which pertains to the theft of trade secrets and such as well as the National Stolen Property Act (NSPA) which relates quite literally to stolen goods.

There are really two main things at play here. First and foremost, there’s the whole piracy versus theft thing, and the fact that — as far as the court is concerned — code is not a physical object. The NSPA makes it illegal to “transport[], transmit[], or transfer[] in interstate or foreign commerce any goods, wares, merchandise, securities or money, of the value of $5,000 or more, knowing the same to have been stolen, converted or taken by fraud.” Since the code isn’t a physical good and was not literally stolen, the court ruled, the NSPA doesn’t apply.

Here it’s worth noting that while Aleyniko didn’t literally steal the code or deprive Goldman Sachs of its use, he did deprive them of something: its exclusive use. The real kicker though, is that he didn’t deprive them of it by taking it for his exclusive use; he deprived them of its exclusive use by effectively destroying its exclusive use. Just think about that for a minute. It’s a lot more complex than words like “theft” or “copying” or “piracy” can really sum up. That said, it’s still soundly in the realm of trade secrets. If you were to take a picture of the fabled Coca Cola recipe, that’s pretty much the same thing. Or is it?

That’s where the second part comes in, the classification of this code as a trade secret. For those of you who don’t know the skinny on this, a trade secret is essentially the best alternative to a patent. Patents secure exclusive use, but they expire. Trade secrets, on the other hand, do not secure exclusive use in any legal sense — you can’t sue to prevent the use of a stolen trade secret — but they also don’t expire. A trade secret is exclusive to you as long as you keep it under wraps, ideally forever. Trade secrets are legally protected from theft however, in that you can charge the thief, but once they’re out, they’re up for grabs.

The EEA illegalizes the theft of trade secrets insofar as “they are related to or included in a product that is produced for or placed in interstate or foreign commerce,” or in other words, trade secrets that you use to make a thing that you sell to people, like the Coca Cola recipe, for instance, or that famous blend of seven mysterious herbs and spices. The code at hand here just helped Goldman Sachs make stock and commodities trades in high volume and do it fast. They weren’t selling anything the code was used in or used to produce and they weren’t going to liscense the code. Therefore, the court ruled, the EEA doesn’t apply and considering that piracy isn’t literal theft, Aleyniko walks on a pair of interesting technicalities.

It’s fascinating really, and speaks to the legal complexities of an increasingly digital world, one where words like “theft” need to stop being thrown around so carelessly. Now that’s not to say Aleyniko didn’t do something to harm Goldman Sachs, or even whether or not he did something that he deserves to be punished for. That is a different question entirely. It does deepen the rabbit hole of what code is in the eyes of law. If your ostensibly trade secret code can be copied and the guy who took it can walk, maybe trade secret isn’t the way to go. A ruling like this is going to make patenting code look a lot more appealing all of a sudden, and patented code is a whole other huge mess. And while this ruling may encourage code patenting, it’s hardly a cut and dried precedent considering that Goldman Sach’s particular trade secret code was of a weird, non-commercial variety. Then again, social networking code doesn’t have any direct commercial applications either, so what if Aleyniko had stolen some code Facebook is hiding somewhere off in a secluded cyber-closet?

The issue of theft and misappropriation of code and other digital information is definitely a very complex one, and this ruling — if nothing else — calls attention to and respects that fact by refusing to simply fall back on the inappropriately simple conclusion “oh, it’s theft.” The Internet blew up in popularity a while ago, but the legal system clearly still has a lot of catching up to do. Hopefully we’re watching the construction of a new, unique lexicon and logic surrounding the realities of a digital world, and I don’t know about you, but I’ll be watching with rapt attention and bated breath.

(h/t Wired, image via New York Times, credit Chip East/Reuters)

Funny picture...

on Tuesday, March 27, 2012


It is only funny because you KNOW IT IS TRUE!!! Look at the ipad gentleman's rant below for the details. All the iPad is is an overgrown iPhone. Way to think different...

Copying is not theft




Just to be clear on this... I don't agree with plagiarism. You can't copy something from someone and try to pass it off as your own. That is just wrong. But making a copy of something and giving credit to the author has always been acceptable. They even have specific rules on how you do that. There is a book I got in school that goes all into how to properly cite your sources in legal writing as well. So give credit where credit is due. Yes, this song I'm listening to is not an original piece by me. The band is well known and there is no way anybody would ever confuse me with being the artist, record company, or anything else to do with the production of the track. Someone shared their record with me and I made a copy of it. That doesn't sound so nefarious now, does it?

Need I say more...

Apple... Think different???

on Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Seriously Apple? Is that really going to be your motto? Let's take a look at this...



There are currently over 64 different Android devices on the market available through a dozen different service providers running dozens of different launchers and roms. There are also on the market today a dozen different tablet devices running android software. All of these have the features of the iPad and MORE! More like USB plugs, SD Card Slots, quad core processors, twice the RAM, and better keyboard interfaces. That is just to start. All Android devices will also charge off any computer through a USB port. I can't even charge my iPad unless it is plugged into the wall or a Mac.

So is Apple different? Mmmmm... maybe four years ago they were. Now they are just the same ole same ole. Even their last iPhone launch and recent iPad launch was just more of the same. Nothing new and nothing driving people to buy it other than man fanaticism toward the brand. I can't take anyone seriously who uses an iPhone for anything other than a phone and media player. The iPad isn't terrible, but there are so many better options out there which are so much more user friendly. If I could justify spending the money then I would absolutely be rocking an Android tablet right now. I don't even bring the iPad with me to work anymore. I just don't get as much use out of it due to the limitations of the device that I wouldn't have with say, an Asus Eee Pad Transformer.

So enjoy standing in lines to get the latest remake of the last iOS product and keep telling yourself that you are thinking differently. All you are really doing is thinking just like Apple, and that isn't different at all. When everybody thinks differently and yet all the thoughts are the same, that is called something else. I think it is the opposite of 'originality'.